Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Little Sister is a BIG WIMP!!

Just thought I would share an email I got from my sister Mary who lives in my hometown which is WAY North in Minnesota-----she is a fine writer and needs to be slapped around for not pursuing that career---seriously! She is a riot and you can JUST imagine what life is like when all 4 of us girls get together---OMG!!!! PS. One of my sisters lives in a sub of Chicago---and me in Minneapolis and another south of me in MN---Here's the email:

Greetings to you all,I am writing today, to issue a ration of crap to my "southern relatives"and to give you a dose of reality. This morning, I was watching theToday show while I got ready for work. I do so love Matt Lauer. Inthis morning's installment, the Weather Channel had sent famedmeteorologist Jim Cantori to the blustery streets of the Chicago. Hewinced as he suffered through the, and I quote, "brutal 14 degreeassault on Chicago". Umm, are you kidding me? Annnd, he added,tomorrow, it was anticipated that the temps may dip to 10 below zero!Again, are you kidding me? If it were that warm here, I would bewearing capri pants! If Jim Cantori and The Weather Channel wouldreally like to show his metal, send his butt here, or up toInternational Falls---I doubt his disposition would be so cheery.It is a balmy 25 begrees below zero. We are thankful, as this is a warmup from 32 below earlier this morning. I am not complaining, mind you.I am a Northerner, and I have learned to cope with winter's shortcomings. I am sending this letter to remind you all of a few things youmay have forgotten about, living in the moderate climates that you all do.

1. Kleenex is no longer a necessity. I find that going outsideremedies a runny nose instantaniously, as your nostrils freezetogether. Although, it does, however, make breathing a difficulty. Inthese economic times, the cost savings out-weigh the negative.

2. And finally, an answer to the burning question-Does leather freeze?Yes, yes it does. Makes me worry about the safety of cows, as the seatsin my Tahoe haven't been soft for a week.

3. I find that the rythmic banging of the "frozen flat spots" on mytires can be manipulated to go along with the beat of the music on theradio if you accelerate.

4. I rather enjoy dressing in layers. Although I look like theMichelin Man, in my head I am fantasizing about being an anstronaut forNASA.

5. Making those tasty Jello treats is now quick and easy, just hold thebowl out the back door to firm things up a bit.

6. My "pitching arm" is getting in great shape for summer activities.Although, truth be known, I am not so sure Cassidy (her Crazy Little Jack Russel) is liking beingTHROWN outside to do her business, but we all must do what we must do.And before I go, I will share one our favorite Seasonal/Regional DumbBlonde Jokes with you.

A blonde and her husband are listening to the radio one morning. Themeteorologist reports that they are expecting a snowstorm, with 9-12inches of accumulation. Yes, snow emergency procedures are in effect,please park your vehicle on the EVEN side of the street.Three days pass. Again, they are listening to radio, and themeteorologist reports that snow is expected for the region. Totalaccumulation of 10-13 inches of snow. Once again, snow emergencyprocedures are in effect, please park your vehicle on the ODD side ofthe street.The next morning, while listening to the radio, the meteorologistreports that more snow is expected. Snow emergency procedures are ineffect, please park you vehicle on ........the power goes out. Theblonde, in a panic, looks to her husband for support. "what are wesupposed to do," she cries, "what side of the street should I park thecar on tonight?" Her husband looks up and says, "I have an idea, whydon't you just leave it in the garage this time."And that is that!

Love you all lots! m.


Cat Nap Inn Primitives said...

you are way to funny..and those soaps look absolutely divine...I am still enjoying mine..but think I need more..I was asking my hubby how he felt about the coffee one..oh the man loves his coffee..says he will divorce me if we run can we mix and match for the $22?...cause I think I want one of everything...

Sue said...

Why oh why don't I remember to go potty before I read your blog....It is -15 right now and I am wearing gloves typing this...Dammmm cold down here in the basement.....Need a bigger lot just to put the excess snow on from my driveway...Oh the Minnesota life....

BirchBerry Farms said...

Mornin'---Yep Gina---if you order them through me here on my blog--they are actually $5 per bar---so let me know if you are wanting some and I will get that out to you lickity split---thanks for the compliments---this new line is really yummy!

Oh Susie--I wish you could have seen Ali come up the steps this morning---she was like--NO WAY, WE HAVE SCHOOL TODAY??? YEP---I see you guys are closed up---I think Anoka/Hennepin (largest district in MN) was the only one that stayed open--heehee---I am NOT going anywhere's today---my big girl diesel was NOT plugged in last night and she is not gonna start today--no way no how!

Love ya's!

Doreen said...

Good morning are you this fine morning!!

OH MY GOD your sis is hysterical!!!!

Thanks for sharing this with us my dear!


BirchBerry Farms said...

Oh shoot D---too funny---I was at your place when you were writing this---I must a just missed ya!

Pam said...

Reene sure hope you stay warm. I couldn't take your temps. We got some snow but wasn't bad...Your sister is funny. But so are you.

have a wonderful day
Hugs Pam

Anonymous said...

LOL!! I love it!! I see that you are all alot alike... My silly and hysterical friend!! Love you lots and I LOVE MY SOAPS!!!! Hugs, MO

tattered 'n torn prims said...

You are a hoot....and it must run in the fam!!! tee hee hee!! I love that you don't need kleenex anymore!!!! hardy har har!!!!

I agree.....your soap is just deeee-lish!!!

Keep warm!! Stace

Brenda, Rusty Creek Primitives said...

LMAO! Your sister is hilarious and now I know it runs in the family!

I sent you an email...did you get it? I think the emails are screwing up again :(

Oh Gosh

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